Author: Find Recovery Editorial Team

“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.”

Step 3 is ultimately about changing the trajectory of one’s life through surrender. Both the word choice and concept of this can be difficult to swallow – even the original text acknowledges the difficulty and that it can seem impossible to fulfill. However, the text also states that this step is one of the most crucial in order to find lasting success with both Alcoholics Anonymous and the remainder of the 12 steps program, making it crucial that working step 3 is done in sincerity.

A Guide to Step 3 of Alcoholics Anonymous

Step 3 is inherently more challenging than the two previous ones because it is the first time being prompted to take action. Steps 1 and 2 were about mental preparation: accepting that healing is needed along with external help. Next is to turn words into action and to make a deeper commitment to the program and in turn, your own recovery. 

Use of the word “decision” is very meaningful as the concept of willingness is an integral part of moving forward in the recovery process. Because while you may find yourself in an AA group meeting against your will, it’s only your own willingness that can bring you to seek real and lasting change. Step 3 marks the first of many active and thoughtfully-made decisions to come. 

The significance of self-will

Step 3 challenges us to  “let go”  so that we are no longer operating solely based on our own self-will. The concept (also referred to as human will or free will) has strong cultural implications and is closely tied to our personal identities. For that reason, the concept of relinquishing that control is one that is quite foreign to us – especially to AA beginners – and can be difficult to grapple with. 

However, this urging to “turn our will” over is not said to eliminate our sense of self or our individuality. Self-will is fraught with ego, bias, and selfishness. It tends to dominate our thoughts and actions and can lead us astray. Forgoing self-will and instead, following a new path that is laid for us via a “higher power” that has our best interests at heart, is far more likely to lead us to recovery.

Working Step 3 if You’re Not Religious

For those who aren’t religious, the mention of ‘God’ can be uncomfortable and a major roadblock to connecting with this statement. However, the original author of the 12 Steps of Recovery wanted the program to be accessible by all and purposely included the phrase “as we understood Him”. Once again, the use of the capitalized ‘h’ in “Him” would appear to be another reference to the standard Christian concept of God. However, it is meant to modify the prior mention of God, and encourage individual interpretation. 

This higher power can simply be a general sense of spirituality or even another person. In many interpretations, participants have determined their AA groups as their higher power. Regardless of how or who you choose to rely on, faith is a major component to successfully working Step 3.

“Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.”

Working Step 2: What It Means & How To Do It

Whereas Step 1 is about recognizing the scope of your substance abuse problem, Step 2 is the leap of faith that emphasizes that overcoming addiction is something you cannot do alone. It’s understanding that up until now, you have primarily been self-reliant in trying to overcome addiction and that now, you are ready to accept external help. 

What does ‘a Power greater than ourselves’ mean?

While the mention of ‘Power’ traditionally refers to God – your interpretation does not have to (we’ll touch back on this later). It can be any person, place, thing, or even a feeling, that can serve as an unwavering source of motivation for you. These external motivators will help keep long-term goals in perspective during moments of weakness.  Examples of non-religious “higher powers” can be an instrument you play, a family member that’s rooting for you, the desire to see the next season of a show you love, or simply your AA sponsor.

What does ‘Restore us to sanity’ mean? 

This phrase is known for being somewhat off-putting to recovering addicts. At face value, it would seem that it is implying the reader is insane or crazy. Naturally, this could be a cause for taking offense. One of the core beliefs of addiction recovery is that you are more than your addiction and it’s odd that an organization dedicated to helping addicts would place such judgment on its participants. 

Step Two is not meant to be a personal attack. Keep in mind that the 12 Steps for Recovery were written nearly a century ago. Many of the terms they use and their way of speaking does not seamlessly carry over to our modern-day language. As for actually carrying out Step 2, consider your actions related to addiction – there are probably a few things that could qualify as a bit insane. 

You may have prioritized drinking over work, relationships, and even your own basic sustenance. You may have done things you never would have otherwise like rob a family member or lie to your spouse. Realizing that your alcohol habits led you to do and say things that are out of character. 

Reading Is Believing…Right? 

One aspect that can sometimes trip up even the most devoted of 12 Step participants is the use of the past tense “came to believe”. Whether these words are read aloud or in your mind, if it sounds like you’re being told that you’ve already done something, you might fail to reflect whether you’ve actually internalized the message being this step. To properly work step two requires reflection and a deep look inward for what truly motivates us – and sometimes, those things aren’t as noble as we would like to believe.

Is Alcoholics Anonymous Only For Christians?

A common challenge new Alcoholics Anonymous members face when participating in the 12 Steps programs is the heavy religious overtones. God, faith, prayer – these are all recurring topics mentioned throughout AA’s principles, foundations, and practices. What’s the connection between Alcoholics Anonymous and religion? It actually is due to the organization’s origins as a Christian group when it was founded almost a century ago in 1935. 

For those who aren’t of the Christian faith – or any faith for that matter – the direct and indirect mentions of God can feel alienating. Fortunately, you don’t need to be religious to participate in AA or successfully complete the 12 Steps of Recovery. Working Step 2 can be done by anyone – no matter their religious affiliation (or lack thereof). 

Find An Alcoholics Anonymous Group Near You

Nowadays, many AA groups have adopted a secular version of the 12 Steps program. The underlying messaging is the same, but the steps have simply been revised to omit any religious mentions. This can make it easier for non-religious members to relate and allows for a wider range of interpretations. Some groups take it a step further and have established themselves as an AA group for non-religious folks to serve as a safe space for agnostics and atheists. 

It’s important to find a group where you feel comfortable – after all, you will have to share some of your lowest moments with these people. To make sure you find the AA group that’s right for you, visit our Alcoholics Anonymous meeting directory to find meetings near you. 

“We admit we are powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.”

Breaking Down Step One: How To Complete It Properly

Step 1 of the Alcoholics Anonymous Program may seem straightforward and simple, but it is quite multifaceted. AA participants often mistakenly consider this first step completed by default since they are already aware that they have a problem. However, this approach will cheapen the eye-opening experience that the 12 Steps are intended to provide. If you’re looking to get the most out of your program, working Step 1 correctly will make your recovery journey so much more meaningful.

Deceptively simple, many fail to recognize the gravity of Step 1 and take it to mean “admitting that there is a problem”. While that is inarguably a crucial part of overcoming addiction, it falls short of this step’s true goal. Misconceptions like these are the main obstacle to properly working Step 1 and getting the most out of Alcoholics Anonymous.

Acknowledging the problem is not the same as true admittance of how out of control your addiction is

Many alcoholics in the beginning stages of Alcoholics Anonymous assume they have already completed Step 1 by default because they are actively partaking in a program, have checked into a rehab facility, or have taken initiative to find resources online. While these are fantastic steps towards recovering from alcohol addiction, they do not automatically mean that you have genuinely come to terms with how out of control your drinking has become and how severely it has disrupted your life.

You can be in Alcoholics Anonymous and still be in denial

Your body may be physically present at a meeting or therapy session, but your mind can still hold pockets of resistance. You might unwittingly still blame a friend or family member for drinking in your presence, that if you just stayed away from them you wouldn’t be tempted to drink. Or perhaps you feel that your high-stress job drove you to alcohol and once you find a new one, your drinking habits will return to normal. 

Thoughts like these indicate that deep down, you feel that your addiction is the fault of others and that external factors are the true culprit, rather than a lack of your own willpower, discipline, or self-control. Denial is commonplace in addiction recovery; it is a psychological form of self-defense as there can be a lot of shame and stigma tied to addiction. But until you have internalized that you are ultimately the person responsible for the situation you are in, true recovery is impossible. To truly complete Step 1, to admit powerlessness and that you have lost control over your life, requires a deep sense of humility and acceptance of responsibility.

Get Help Working Step 1

Completing step one is a crucial part of the addiction recovery process. However, it can be quite challenging as you must overcome any lingering sense of denial or blame towards others. Coming to terms and facing the reality of your addictions is the most powerful catalyst for positive change – but difficult to do on your own. Find an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting near you today with our helpful and free AA directory. 

According to reports published by Alcoholics Anonymous, there are nearly 2.1 million AA members across the world. That is over 2 million individuals who have a desire to stop drinking alcohol and to stay sober. If this was an easy feat, then alcoholics wouldn’t need a support group. Figuring out how to stop drinking alcohol is something that each and every one of these members has most likely struggled with. Here are 10 things you can do to improve your journey to sobriety:

1. Make a plan
2. Establish a support system
3. Be open-minded
4. Implement self-care 
5. Pay attention to your diet & nutrition
6. Talk to your doctor
7. Find new, healthy hobbies
8. Download a recovery app
9. Set attainable long-term goals
10. Reach out for help

Make a Plan

It’s easier to cope with the struggles of recovery when there is a plan already set. For instance, don’t wait until the cravings have already set in to decide how to overcome them. It is easier to overcome cravings when you have already had coping strategies in place. Consider what you will do and who you will call. What if you get withdrawal symptoms? Will you be in a facility that can treat you? If not, how will you get help in the event of a medical emergency? A treatment center has professionals who will help a client develop and implement a plan for recovery.

Establish Your Support System

Support from family and friends can be extremely helpful through the recovery process, but family members don’t necessarily understand what you are going through. Having professional and/or relatable support usually comes from places outside of your immediate social circle. Alcoholics Anonymous runs support group meetings that can be found across the country and are offered in various formats to meet each community’s needs. Through AA you can also find a sponsor, someone you can call whenever you need to talk and help hold you accountable. For those who don’t feel AA is right for them, there are other support options such as SMART Recovery.

Be Open-Minded

When it comes to getting sober and receiving treatment, stay open-minded. You may not have been someone who ever expected to take a yoga class, but you may end up finding this type of therapy extremely helpful. Additionally, it is ideal to be able to get sober without taking additional medications, but for some people, MAT is the safest route. Medications such as naltrexone have been found to be highly effective for alcohol recovery. Be willing to try different treatments and therapies to find what works for you.

Implement Self Care

Self-care means taking the time to do things that improve mental and physical wellbeing. Massages and yoga classes are 2 examples of common self-care activities, but in reality, self-care looks different for each person. For one person, self-care may be taking a nature walk once a week, whereas for others it might be going golfing. Think about what brings you joy and make it a point to find time for that particular activity.

Pay Attention to Your Diet & Nutrition

What you put into your body can either strengthen or weaken both your mind and body. For one, proper nutrition will improve the detox process by reducing the severity and length of withdrawal symptoms. On the other hand, malnutrition and dehydration can make symptoms significantly worse. Some symptoms, such as cravings, can actually last for months into sobriety. Proper nutrition can actually help reduce these symptoms and promote healing of damage that alcohol causes to one’s heart, brain, and liver. 

Talk to Your Doctor

Alcohol detox can be dangerous for an individual with a severe addiction. Before going “cold turkey”, talk with your primary care physician. They can evaluate your situation and provide advice to minimize any possible risks associated with getting sober. There is no need to risk any complications when your goal is to improve your life for the long term. An alcohol detox facility will provide access to a medical doctor that can help ensure your wellbeing and provide medical attention.

Find New, Healthy Hobbies

When going to bars or staying home with a bottle of whiskey are no longer options, what are you going to do with your free time? Think of sobriety as an opportunity to pick up a new hobby, skill, or activity. Maybe you are going to learn how to code or maybe you are going to grow a garden. 

Download a Recovery App

There are countless applications that you can download on your phone to get portable support. Some of them you can even download for free. For instance, Sober Grid is a free online recovery forum and Sobriety Counter counts how much money you have saved by not drinking. Here is a list of recovery mobile apps:

• 12 Steps AA Companion
• I Am Sober
• Nomo
• Sober Grid
• Sobriety Counter
• Stop Drinking with Andrew Johnson
• Twenty-Four Hours a Day

Set Attainable Long-term Goals

Why do you want to get sober? Are you hoping to improve your relationship with your spouse or children? Do you want to progress in your career? What does this look like? Use these questions to set some goals for yourself. Make sure they are attainable. An example of a strong, attainable goal would be “plan a date with my spouse once a month for 6 months.” Sticking to this goal helps create structure and helps rebuild an important relationship.

Reach Out For Help

Never, I repeat, never think that you have to do this alone. There is always someone who will be willing to talk with you or help you through a tough time. From family and friends to crisis helplines, you are never without an option. At Find Recovery, our helpline is open 24/7. We are here to help direct you to the resources that you need.

Have you ever gone to a party with friends and started off with a few mixed drinks, then taken a couple of shots of tequila in between drinks, then shotgunned a beer, and had a couple more mixed drinks? Well, that is certainly a case of binge drinking, but not all cases are this severe and some are more severe. So what exactly is binge drinking?

According to Merriam Webster, the definition of the noun binge is an unrestrained and often excessive indulgence or an act of excessive or compulsive consumption (as of food). Binge drinking is when you drink excessively, but “excessive” can be subjective? In order to talk scientifically about binge drinking, we need to define where the line is. 

Different organizations define binge drinking differently based on a few different factors. These factors could be the number of drinks consumed, blood alcohol content, gender, and length of use. The National Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Addiction (NIAAA) and the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) are 2 of the more reputable organizations that provide definitions of binge drinking.

NIAAA – “a pattern of drinking alcohol that brings blood alcohol concentration (BAC) to 0.08 percent – or 0.08 grams of alcohol per deciliter – or higher. For a typical adult, this pattern corresponds to consuming 5 or more drinks (male), or 4 or more drinks (female), in about 2 hours.” 

SAMSHA – “5 or more alcoholic drinks for males or 4 or more alcoholic drinks for females on the same occasion (i.e., at the same time or within a couple of hours of each other) on at least 1 day in the past month.”

Binge Drinking vs. Heavy Alcohol Use

We now understand that binge drinking is drinking alcohol to excess, but then what is heavy alcohol use? Aren’t they the same thing? Actually, they are not. 

The NIAAA’s definition for binge drinking isn’t that far off from their definition of heavy alcohol use, “more than 4 drinks on any day for men or more than 3 drinks for women.” However, the way SAMHSA differs the 2 is that binge drinking is drinking heavily within a short period of time whereas heavy alcohol use is binge drinking over a period of time: “binge drinking on 5 or more days in the past month.”

Who Binge Drinks?

According to the CDC (who uses the NIAAA definitions for binge drinking and heavy alcohol use0, about 1 in 6 adults binge drink 4 or more times per month. Additionally, men and people between ages 18 and 34 are the populations most likely to binge drink. Lastly, of the people under age 21 who report drinking any alcohol, the majority participate in binge drinking.

Risks of Binge Drinking

The risks associated with binge drinking are many and are extremely severe. These include:

• Alcohol use disorders/alcohol addiction
• Heart disease
• Accidental injuries (car crashes, falls, and burns)
• Violence towards others and self
• Poor pregnancy outcomes
• Cancer (mouth, throat, esophagus, breast, liver, colon)
• Memory loss
• Learning impairments
• Death

Preventing Binge Drinking

It can be easy to say “don’t drink excessively”, but it is not as easily done. For one, many people don’t know what constitutes binge drinking or how dangerous it can be. Additionally, alcoholism is a powerful mental illness that is not always overcome easily. However, just because preventing binge drinking is difficult, doesn’t mean it is impossible. If you could save yourself or your loved one from the risks listed above, wouldn’t you? Here are 3 things you can do to prevent binge drinking:

• Educate your children, friends, and/or family members on what binge drinking is and it’s risks.
• Set an example and limit your drinks. Say no to the round of shots. Just by you saying no, others who aren’t interested will feel more comfortable also saying no.
• Provide delicious alternatives to alcoholic drinks. Think mocktails. Believe it or not, those fruity mixed drinks still taste amazing without alcohol.