Al-Anon is a support group for friends and family members of individuals who struggle with alcohol addiction. The meetings provide a safe and confidential space for individuals to share their experiences, strength, and hope with others who understand what they are going through. 

A Breakdown of Al-Anon Meeting Topics

Addiction is an all-encompassing disease, so naturally, there’s a very broad list of potential topics for discussion, ranging from managing family relationships to finding humor during hard times. Al-Anon meeting topics tend to fall under the following categories:

Understanding the nature of alcoholism

Members learn about the physical, emotional, and psychological effects of alcohol addiction and how it can impact relationships, finances, and overall well-being. This insight helps for better understanding and empathy with the loved one struggling with a drinking problem.

Coping with the impact of alcoholism 

Providing support and guidance for the emotional pain, stress, and confusion that often accompanies loving someone who struggles with alcohol addiction is one of the main goals of the organization. Members learn how to take care of themselves, set healthy boundaries, and manage their emotions. They learn about the importance of self-care and self-compassion for the sake of themselves and the addicted person they want to support.

Finding hope and healing

Alcoholism hurts everyone around the drinker and can leave loved ones with feelings of anger, guilt, or hopelessness. Some topics offer messages of hope and healing for members who may have felt helpless and alone in their struggles. They learn that they are not alone in their experience and that there is a way forward. 

Building healthy relationships

Al-Anon members will be encouraged to explore how alcoholism has affected their relationships and how they can build healthier ones in the future. They learn how to maintain healthy relationships with the person struggling with addiction without enabling them. 

Taking responsibility 

Although Al-Anon members are not responsible for the alcohol addiction of their loved ones, they can take accountability for their own actions and reactions. This means taking ownership over their behaviors that may have been enabling or triggering to their addicted loved one; or a guilt trip that can leave a person feeling more isolated than inspired to change.

Letting go and Living in the present

Al-Anon members learn that they cannot control the behavior of the person struggling with addiction, but they can control how they respond to it. They learn how to let go of the need to control and accept the things they cannot change. Al-Anon members learn to focus on the present moment and to let go of the past and the future. They learn how to live in the present and enjoy life despite the challenges that come with living with someone who struggles with addiction.

Spirituality

Al-Anon isn’t a religious organization but many members find that their spiritual beliefs can be a source of strength and support during the recovery process. Meetings may include discussions of spirituality and how it can be incorporated into recovery.

Types of Al-Anon Meetings

The topic discussed as an Al-Anon meeting is largely shaped by the type of meeting that’s being held. There are twelve different formats that meetings may rotate between. Meeting formats will also change how the discussions are conducted, and who’s allowed to attend. 

Step Study – Study of the classic Twelve Steps. Typically covered once a month. Closely related are the Concepts and Principles meetings. 

Traditions Study – The group studies one or more of the Al-Anon or Alateen Traditions, keeping in mind their value in maintaining the unity and growth of worldwide Al-Anon as well as of the group itself. Applying them to family relationships may offer new insight.

Slogans Study – Al-Anon involves many slogans. Members are invited to explain how they apply a particular one in their lives or how the slogan could be used to solve a specific problem.

Personal Stories – One or more members are asked in advance to speak at the meeting and tell how the Al-Anon program helped them find a new way of life.

Topic Discussion – The chairperson or leader presents a topic to help members share the principles of the program and discuss the subject as it applies to them.

Panel Discussion – Members are invited to write anonymous questions which are answered by the group or the chairperson.

Exchange Meeting – An individual or team of speakers from another Al-Anon/Alateen group may exchange speakers.

Open Meeting – Non-Al-Anon members may attend. This includes friends, A.A. members, students, and professionals are welcome.

Outside Speakers Meeting – May include A.A. members, a husband, wife, and child team, members of the clergy, doctors, social workers, or other professionals in the field of alcoholism.

Beginners Meeting – An introductory meeting may be held 30 to 45 minutes before the regular meeting to acquaint newcomers with the Al-Anon program

Group Inventory Meeting

These are some of the main topics that may be covered in Al-Anon meetings, but the focus may vary depending on the specific meeting and the needs of the group. The meetings provide a supportive, non-judgmental space for individuals to share their experiences, gain insight, and find hope and healing.

Ready to get started? Check out our directory to find in-person and virtual Al-Anon meetings near you.

Everyone loves a good compliment. But can they contribute to our mental health during recovery? Can they motivate us to stay on track? Can they contribute to better physical health? This article will explore these and other questions and provide guidelines for complimenting someone recovering from addiction.

Why Compliments Are Important

Compliments show that words can be compelling. A well-placed and genuine compliment can make others feel good and make them want to be around you. These are some of the most essential benefits of compliments.

They increase confidence

One of the most immediate benefits of compliments is that they make the receiver feel good. Being told they have admirable qualities is a confidence boost that few other interactions provide.

They build trust between the giver and the receiver

Both giving and receiving compliments are vulnerable acts. The giver opens up their inner thoughts and feelings, and the receiver makes themselves vulnerable by allowing a personal comment.

They make us happy

A study found that when people spend money on others, they find it more gratifying than spending it on themselves. We are conditioned to derive happiness from benefiting others. Both the giver and receiver get a happiness boost from compliments.

They contribute to good mental and physical health

Lonely people are less resilient to stress and more often suffer from inflammatory disorders like obesity, high blood pressure, and others. By making people happier and improving trust, compliments actually make us healthier.

Compliments For Addiction Recovery

There are multiple compliments you can give someone recovering from addiction. Regardless of the specific compliment you give them, the most crucial consideration to make is that the compliments are authentic, genuine, and relevant to their recovery efforts.

Here are some examples:

• I’m proud of the effort you’re putting in
• You’re strong for making an effort to improve and recover
• You’re on the right path
• You’ve made so much progress
• You’re making progress every day
• Recovery is a process, and you’re making it happen every day
• You’re capable of achieving your goal
• You’ve been very strong a resilient
• You can overcome the challenge of recovery
• I trust your recovery decisions
• You’ve been capable of getting out of your comfort zone for recovery
• I’m proud of your commitment to sobriety
• You’ve come so far in your recovery path
• I can only imagine how hard it’s been, but you look so much happier since your recovery started

When you compliment someone recovering from addiction, emphasize their effort to improve their lives and stay sober. Focus on things they can control, like making positive choices for their lives and recovery.

Finally, remember to emphasize the results they’ve already achieved: how long they’ve been sober, the research they’ve made when they’ve had doubts and how it’s helped them, their consistency in attending therapy or taking their medications, and more.

Your words can significantly contribute to their mental and physical well-being. They can play a major role in helping them stay consistent in their recovery process.

How To Give A Good Compliment?

While there’s no specific guide to give a good compliment, there are some guidelines to consider; here are some of them:

• Don’t underestimate their power. We often overestimate how awkward a compliment may come off and underestimate its positive effect on the receiver. If it’s true and comes from a genuine place, rest assured that they will appreciate it.
• Be specific. Pay attention to the efforts your loved one makes for their recovery and compliment them on it. Generic compliments can be great, but it’s so much more meaningful when you can share the intimacy of appreciating each other for being grateful and observant.
• Give them as frequently as your loved one feels comfortable with. This study suggests that some people have trouble receiving compliments because they have self-esteem issues. If the compliment they receive clashes with their ideas about themselves, they may not be flattered. Since mental illnesses can affect self-esteem, be sure to balance genuine compliments with a frequency your loved one appreciates. Giving too many can backfire, but giving too little may not work either. Find the balance.
• Be sincere. This seems obvious, but we’ve mentioned it before. Still, your compliments should be something you feel deeply about and want to convey to your loved ones. If your loved one is making an honest effort to get better, it won’t be hard to find things to compliment them.

Mental Health Is Just As Important As Physical Health During Recovery

It’s easy to confuse addiction as a purely physical illness. In reality, it’s caused by a very complex combination of genetic and environmental factors. Contributing to your recovering loved one’s mental health is very kind and may encourage them to stay on their path.

Complimenting them sincerely and thoughtfully can be a great way to boost their mental health. Still, you must find a balance in the frequency: too many can be overwhelming, and too few can make them feel underappreciated.

Ultimately, you know them best and are in the best position to know what to say and when. Above all, be observant, patient, and compassionate.

While both Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon are based on the 12-step recovery model and share many other similarities, the 12 principles of Al-Anon are different from the 12 principles of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). 

Alcoholics Anonymous principles are designed to help individuals struggling with alcohol addiction find recovery and healing. These principles outline the steps that individuals can take to address their addiction, including admitting powerlessness over alcohol, seeking help and guidance from a higher power, and making amends to those they have harmed.

The 12 Principles of Al-Anon, on the other hand, are designed to help the loved ones of alcoholics find peace and healing in the face of their loved one’s addiction. They also provide a framework for addressing the negative patterns and behaviors that often arise in relationships with alcoholics, and offer guidance on how to find support and strength in the face of these challenges.

What are the 12 Principles of Al-Anon and what do they mean?

Al-Anon and AA technically have identical principles that serve as the foundation of each respective organization. However, the key difference between them is how they are applied and put into practice for Al-Anon members.

For example, the principle of admitting powerlessness over the alcoholic’s behavior helps loved ones recognize that they cannot control or change the alcoholic’s actions and that their attempts to do so have likely only caused more pain and turmoil. By surrendering control and seeking support from a higher power or community, loved ones can begin to find peace and healing in their own lives and let go of the guilt or anger they may feel toward themselves or their loved ones.

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable. 

Acknowledging that loved ones cannot control or change the alcoholic’s behavior and that attempts to do so have only caused chaos and distress in their lives.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 

In recognition that ultimately, the individual with the drinking problem is responsible for their actions (as well as changing them), friends and family members of this person relinquish both control and the idea that they as an individual can “fix” the alcoholic in their life. 

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. 

The first and second principles mentally prepare us to surrender control. The third principle puts it into action and encourages Al-Anon members to trust a higher power to guide their loved one’s sobriety, as well as manage their own emotions.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. 

Loved ones must take an honest look at their own behavior and attitudes, and acknowledge any negative patterns that may be contributing to the alcoholic’s behavior. By being willing to change and grow, loved ones can create positive change in their own lives and in their relationships with the alcoholic.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. 

A loved one in Al-Anon may be an enabler racked with guilt, or perhaps in their frustration over the situation, take out their anger on an innocent family member. There are countless circumstances where even the loved ones of alcoholics may find themselves with wrongs they need to right. Confessing and owning up to those mistakes establishes accountability from others and will lead to changes in behavior.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. 

Similar to that of the alcoholic in AA, the loved one in Al-Anon must be willing to let go of negative or harmful patterns and behaviors. Since they already admitted to a lack of control over the situation, they must then turn to a higher power to have them removed.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. 

This means recognizing that we cannot change or heal ourselves. Whatever this “higher power” is to the individual, this step is when we look to it with an earnest intention to be a better person.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. 

The principle of making amends to those we have harmed helps loved ones repair relationships and address any harm they may have caused to others. By taking responsibility for their actions and seeking to make things right, loved ones can find healing and reconciliation in their relationships.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. 

This means taking action to make amends and repair relationships while also considering the well-being of others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. 

Being a supportive partner isn’t something that just happens overnight. Just as a person in recovery will have setbacks, so too can the supporting family members or friends. Ongoing self-reflection and willingness to correct those mistakes will maintain an atmosphere of forgiveness and encouragement.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. 

The 11th principle highlights the importance of having the right mindset as you near the end of the program. Seeking a deeper connection with a higher power (and maintaining that desire for a deeper connection) will keep one mindful of their ultimate goal.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. 

Once a person has gone through all 12 principles of Al-Anon, the idea is to share the experience with other family and friends of those with Alcoholics and apply the principles of Al-Anon to all areas of our lives.

These principles focus on helping loved ones recognize their own powerlessness over their alcoholic’s behavior, seek support and guidance from a higher power, and take steps to change and grow in their own lives. Learn more and find an Al-Anon meeting near you today.

No, Al-Anon is not an abbreviation for the widely known organization, Alcoholics Anonymous, nor are they one and the same. Al-Anon is a distinct organization that boasts a worldwide presence just like its similarly-named predecessor. Unlike AA, Al-Anon provides support and guidance to family, friends, and loved ones who have been affected by someone else’s alcoholism. However, the fascinating history of Al-Anon is closely intertwined with Alcoholics Anonymous’s own.

Who started Al-Anon?

The organization was founded by a woman named Lois Wilson. Ring a bell? It should. Lois was the wife of Bill Wilson, the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).

Lois Wilson had struggled for many years with the impact of her husband’s alcoholism. Although there was a growing community for individuals like her husband, who struggled with their drinking, she found that there was a lack of support and resources available for the people who lived with and loved someone with a drinking disorder. 

Lois quickly recognized the need for a program that could provide guidance and support for friends and family members. The organization was formally established in 1951 when Lois received a list of 87 of what was then referred to as ‘family groups’, from around the world. She then sent a questionnaire to these groups with the intention of unifying them. 

It was through this questionnaire that the current name, Al-Anon Family Groups, was chosen. (This parent organization also includes Alateen, which is a group created to support teenagers who have been affected by someone else’s drinking.) 

There are many similarities between Al-Anon and Alcoholics Anonymous, from the guiding principles and literature to the meeting structure and organizational operations. With the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous, Al-Anon adopted AA’s Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. 

What are the Al-Anon 12 principles?

The principles of Al-Anon are based on the 12 Steps of AA and are virtually identical to the original. These are designed to provide guidance and support for individuals who are affected by someone else’s alcoholism. They encourage participants to work towards acceptance, healing, and personal growth.

One of the key principles of Al-Anon is the idea of detachment. This involves letting go of the need to control someone else’s behavior and focusing on one’s own recovery and well-being. Al-Anon teaches participants to recognize the impact of someone else’s alcoholism on their own lives and to take steps to protect themselves and focus on their own well-being.

Another important principle of Al-Anon is the idea of anonymity. Like Alcoholics Anonymous, keeping the identity of participants confidential within the group is a high priority. Living and loving a person with a drinking problem can conjure all sorts of emotions, many of which may lead to feelings of guilt and distress for the loved one experiencing them. Anonymity ensures a safe and supportive environment where individuals can share their experiences without fear of judgment or stigma.

What are the Al-Anon 12 Traditions?

In addition to the 12 Steps of Al-Anon, the organization also follows a set of guiding principles known as the Al-Anon Traditions. These Traditions outline the principles that guide the organization and provide a framework for the way in which Al-Anon groups operate.

1. The common goals and welfare of the group come first.
2. The higher power is the only authority, the chairperson and the leaders of the group do not govern.
3. The only requirement for membership is the alcoholism of a family member or a friend.
4. Each group is an individual entity except when it concerns Al-Anon as a whole or Alcoholics Anonymous.
5. The group only has one purpose. This purpose is to help those who have family members or friends who are alcoholics.
6. The family groups are not to use the Al-Anon name, unless it is in relation to the group or program.
7. The groups are self supporting and do accept donations from outside the group.
8. Al-Anon groups are not professional organizations. They only employ people under special circumstances.
9. The groups should never be organized except when there is a need for a board they directly serve those in the group.
10. The groups should have no opinion on outside factors such as politics or other affiliations.
11. Public advertising is for attraction not promotion. This is an anonymous group and anonymity must be maintained.
12. Principles should be placed above personalities.

The main goal of Al-Anon is to provide a supportive environment for individuals to share their experiences and to receive guidance and support from others who are also affected by someone else’s alcoholism. Al-Anon meetings are typically held in a group format, and they may include the sharing of personal stories, discussion of Al-Anon literature, and group discussions.

If you are interested in attending a local Al-Anon meeting, find one near you today. They are open to all and anyone can pop in at any time. 

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a worldwide organization whose foundational principle of the Twelve Steps has become synonymous with addiction recovery. However, those alone are not the sole reason for the organization’s widespread success. AA meetings are a key component of its approach to recovery, providing a safe and supportive environment where people experiencing alcoholism can find encouragement and guidance. Curious about joining? Here’s what you should know before taking the first step of attending a meeting:

How long is an AA meeting?

Alcoholics Anonymous meeting structures can vary depending on the specific group and the activities planned for that particular meeting. Despite this, all AA meetings typically last around one hour. Group leaders are aware that people have busy schedules and lives and do their best to be respectful of others’ time.

What happens in AA meetings?

During an AA meeting, participants will typically follow a structured format that includes the following components:

Opening remarks: The meeting leader or facilitator will typically begin the meeting by welcoming everyone and introducing any new members or visitors.

Sharing of personal stories: Participants are usually encouraged to share their experiences with alcohol addiction and recovery. This can include talking about the challenges and struggles they have faced, as well as any progress or successes they have achieved.

Reading and discussion of AA literature: This may include reading from the organization’s “Big Book” or other AA literature, and discussing the principles and teachings contained within.

Group discussion: This may include group members discussing specific topics related to recovery, or simply sharing their thoughts and experiences.

Closing remarks: The meeting leader or facilitator will typically conclude the meeting by thanking everyone for their participation and reminding them of any upcoming events or meetings.

Can I just turn up to an AA meeting?

Yes, anyone is welcome to attend Alcoholics Anonymous meetings regardless of their specific substance use history, the stage of their addiction treatment journey, or whether they’ve gone to an AA meeting before. Per AA’s core philosophy, these meetings are open to anyone who is seeking support and guidance in their journey toward recovery from alcohol addiction.

It is important to note that AA meetings are not a substitute for professional treatment. If you are struggling with alcohol addiction and are seeking treatment, it is important to speak with a healthcare professional or a substance abuse treatment provider. They can help you to determine the most appropriate course of treatment for your specific needs and circumstances.

If you are interested in attending an AA meeting, you can find a meeting near you by visiting the AA website or by searching online for AA meetings in your local area. Many AA groups also have information about their meetings listed in local newspapers or community bulletins. You can also ask your healthcare provider or a substance abuse treatment provider for information about AA meetings in your area.

What AA meetings are not

One of the key components of AA meetings is the sharing of personal stories. Participants are encouraged to share their experiences with alcohol addiction and recovery and to discuss the challenges and struggles they have faced along the way. This helps to create a sense of connection and support among the group members and allows them to draw strength and encouragement from one another.

It is important to note that AA meetings are not therapy sessions and they are not intended to be a substitute for professional treatment. Rather, they provide a supportive and structured setting for people to share their experiences with others who are also working to overcome their addiction.

What is the true success rate of AA?

The success rate of Alcoholics Anonymous is difficult to quantify. AA is a voluntary (and anonymous) program where individuals may come and go as they please. There’s no commitment required at any instance, so gathering any sort of data or metrics about AA participants can be challenging at best.

However, many people who have participated in AA have reported that the support and guidance they received from the organization and its members have been invaluable in their journey toward recovery. Regardless, it is always recommended that individuals seeking recovery from alcohol addiction seek out a combination of professional treatment and support from AA and other peer support groups.

Overall, AA meetings provide a supportive and structured environment for individuals working to overcome their alcohol addiction. Through the sharing of personal stories, discussion of literature, and other activities, this organization helps to provide guidance and support for those in recovery and can be an important part of the journey toward lasting recovery. Find a local AA group near you today.