The holiday season can be challenging for those on the path to sobriety. Thanksgiving, in particular, often revolves around communal drinking, making it a potential minefield for those avoiding alcohol. Enter Friendsgiving – a modern twist on the traditional holiday gathering tailored to fit your sober lifestyle.
A Supportive Twist on Traditional Celebrations
Gather your friends who support your sobriety journey or are on a similar path themselves, and celebrate with a sumptuous feast, alcohol-free mocktails, and engaging activities. Here are some tips to make your sober Friendsgiving a memorable one.
1. Choose the Right Venue
The venue sets the stage for your gathering, influencing the overall vibe and comfort level. Whether it’s your home, a friend’s place, or even an outdoor setting, make sure it’s a space where everyone can feel relaxed and at ease. An outdoor venue can offer a tranquil, natural atmosphere, while a home setting provides warmth and familiarity.
At the same time, it’s crucial to avoid venues that could be triggering for those in recovery. Bars, restaurants focusing on alcohol, or even family homes where drinking was once a norm can evoke memories or temptations that could be counterproductive to the event’s purpose.
2. Invite the Right People
The beauty of hosting your own Friendsgiving is the freedom to choose your company. Invite friends who support your sobriety journey or who are navigating their own. This could include friends from rehab or support groups like AA, ensuring a supportive environment for everyone involved.
3. Set the Ground Rules
Once your guest list is finalized, it’s crucial to communicate the event’s sober nature. Make it clear that the gathering will be free of alcohol and substances. Encourage everyone, even those not in recovery, to respect this by not questioning or commenting on others’ choices to abstain. The goal is to foster a supportive, judgment-free zone.
4. Organize Sober Activities and Games
A successful Friendsgiving isn’t just about the food and drinks; it’s also about enjoyment and bonding. Consider organizing a pumpkin decorating contest to embrace the fall spirit. Give guests small pumpkins, paint, markers, and stickers, and let their creativity run wild. Other group activities could include Thanksgiving-themed trivia, Pictionary, or charades.
5. Get Creative with Mocktails
Mocktails can be a delightful addition to your event, but ensuring they don’t become a trigger is essential. Avoid using mocktail recipes that closely mimic the taste or presentation of popular alcoholic drinks.
Instead, focus on unique, flavorful combinations that stand on their own. For those who might find mocktails triggering, offer a variety of herbal teas, flavored waters, or fresh fruit juices as alternatives.
6. Foster a Gratitude-Focused Atmosphere
Take some time during the gathering to focus on gratitude. A “Gratitude Jar” can be a heartfelt activity – guests write down what they’re thankful for and place the notes in a jar. At the end of the evening, read the notes aloud to share in the collective gratitude and reflection.
7. Have a Support Plan in Place
Even in a sober environment, the holidays can bring up emotions that may be challenging for some. Have a quiet space where people can step away if they need a moment to themselves. Also, consider having a list of support resources or contacts for anyone needing extra help during the event.
Benefits of Sober Friendsgiving
Hosting or attending a sober Friendsgiving offers numerous advantages:
- Less Exposure to Triggers: In a sober setting, you’re less likely to face uncomfortable questions or temptations related to drinking.
- A Clear Mind During the Holidays: Without the distractions of alcohol, you can fully engage in meaningful conversations and activities.
- Create Lasting Memories: A sober Friendsgiving allows you to build new, positive memories reinforcing your sobriety commitment.
- Strengthen Your Sobriety: Successfully navigating a sober holiday gathering boosts your confidence and resolve to maintain your sobriety.
- Deepening Friendships: A sober environment allows for more genuine connections, deepening friendships that can be crucial support networks in your sobriety journey.
- Personal Growth: Taking the initiative to host a sober event can be empowering, giving you a sense of accomplishment and control over your social life.
The Bottom Line
Hosting or attending a sober Friendsgiving is about more than just avoiding alcohol; it’s about creating a safe, supportive environment that enriches your life and strengthens your journey to sobriety. If you find the holidays challenging, remember that support is available. You’re not alone, and resources are at hand to help you maintain your sobriety and find joy in the season.
